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Hi Again.

May 2024

When you've found your mother

And you never thought you would again

Or you sing Bulletproof by La Roux

But not today, I mean when it came out

With the Little League World Series on the line

And no concept of femininity or sexual politics

It's all so familiar

The time before the womb

Between lives

When you can see it all

Remember it all

Feel it all at once

And these things have a habit of returning

And they always surprise you, you fragile human

And the ones that cause fear are deep

But the calm ones are deeper

Deeper

And to recognize nearly erases it

To bring it from the sea to the surface

To bask and then dry out in the sun

Seaweed always needs a dip

And has a habit of washing ashore

As if it wants to

As if you can't predict the tides

You can't, you can't!

But you can swim

That much you can do

And we always return to the water

Where we came from

Where there is peace

Where there have always been weird fishes

And we have always been them

But I know a weird fish when I see one

And I think it feels me, too.

Hi again.

Lianne La Havas Is a Pisces to Me

March 2024

Lianne La Havas is a Pisces to me

She isn't, actually

But Spotify said her cover of Weird Fishes

Belongs in Pisces Country

I want to write now

Because I don't want to

But Lianne helped me realize

Weird fishes

Although ugly

And not very tasty

Want to play with me

When I go swimming

And even when I'm thrown into the sea with rocks tied to my legs

What's the point of the Red Sea

Other than the salt

That's fun to float with

And not to worry about mischievous creatures

But it's there for a reason beyond the fun

And the surface

It was once a desert

Or a salt plain or something

Something barren and hopeless

And it lives because it was

And the fishes don't

But elsewhere, where I am, they do

And they want to play

And I want to swim in every sea

And even say hi to all the weird fishes

So they can tell me where the Red Sea is

And not to go there

But I'll appreciate their guidance

And they might hate it

But I'll go float too

April 2020

Old like the pagoda living just to live

Losing all my rings in place of substance I’m to give

Exist the hell out of old church bells in chiming harmony 

All I know is I’m still here and I just might be me

 

Heart is running to the north and shipping off to sea

Body’s statuesque in Rome like David and Anthony 

Supercut of my whole life is smudged, the light is low

Branches weave out through the dark and slowly start to grow

Gilded Ships

July 2020

It doesn’t seem like that’s all it takes

To draw a Golden ship through a sea of mistakes

To the coastline where maybe there’s a new beginning

But slaves outwit preachers they can feel the sinning

 

Days at the beach could be in the future

And I’m treading water can I see the bottom?

If it’s a long way down will it matter to her?

If in 500 years it’s a sonnet you’ve heard?

Staying

September 2022

Drop a bead along my back, no

Pour a cloud, better yet

Move me with it, here to stay

Rain smells sweet and tastes like sweat

'Twas not the hill that bred the man

In captivation, to the top

Perhaps green pastures spurs the fan

Not his strength but with a rock

Let me look back in disgust

And sweat the salt out, to the dust

The lavender is but a gust

Embedded in the upper crust

Let it lie of green down there

For Sisyphus to feel of use

I'll take my lavender raincloud

Sweat is sweet and so profuse

February 2021

It could be for a blessing

Is what is blessed always obsessing

Or is it a tribe with the peaceful fishes

Unabashedly undressing

 

What does it mean to the river with us

Inadvertently religious

If eden's downstream being paid no mind

With eden also left behind

 

I’m no drownded pharaoh, honey

But lately I need my dreams read

I’ll float down in a basket soon enough

And meet you in the ocean instead

August 2020

I spent a lot of time ticking and not rounding through

A broken clock with a heartbeat that’s plenty for two

But my second hand's been missing and that’s made me poor

With the wealth that you give me every second is four

 

We’ve caught up we’re in tune we’re in sync we’re on track

So let’s save some daylight and roll it on back

Your sweet steady song plays all day in my head

We don’t recognize the face of the clock by my bed

 

I don’t want every second to turn into four

I’ll freeze the sunset to squeeze out some more

The face of my clock has changed and it’s you

I want to be with at 1:32

Canine Teeth

June 2021

I may look like a Trojan but I got the eyes of a bard

I don’t want my sword unsheathed

Telling stories ain’t twice as hard

As picturing me with canine teeth

 

Run the clock above my bed

Forward, quickly, lotus leaf

Skip past the vanished second hand

I want to lose my canine teeth

 

Age is sharply there, incise

Largely late in disbelief

Let my mouth breathe silhouettes

Of my own fucking canine teeth

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